the one holding my soul.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

i guess you cant judge the way we are this way. different batch has their own different style of doing things. perhaps you can compare us with the previous batch but i think we just don show and appreciate things the way you expect it to be. indeed, the political right way when someone show you concern is to give back the same amount of love and concern back. however, if we do not show it in the politically right way, it does not mean we dont appreciate you or anyone else for instance.

but even if you think we are just not appreciative or maybe if we really arent appreciative, but shouldn't a teacher like you be doing this out of the love for us and sincerity, and not like other teachers? To me, when teachers give to their students for the sake of their job, perhaps they do want sth in return or to feel appreciated by gestures of their students. but if a teacher is doing it sincerely for their students, would you actually mind not having anything in return? Not trying to be nobelistic here, but i feel that if one is really concern and love something, he or she does something with no intention of recieving back anything. do you think gabriel takes up the role of a president and does the all the sai gang of a leader becos he wans to feel appreciated? do you think i conduct the band only to want the band to give me back something in return? i guess we do all these becos we enjoy and love what we are doing and if we don get back anything, we are fine with it..

i'm quite shocked when you said we were unappreciative of whatever you did for us. we have eyes to know who gives us their most and care for us. To me, your presence in the bandroom listening to us makes a lot of difference. and as a player i guess the best way to appreciate your sincerity is to play the notes on the score more than for the sake of music itself. music is dumb if you are playing it to make it musical, but it actually makes more sense if you play music for someone, right? and thats my way of appreciating yr presence. different people have different characters and ways to love a person. i don say thank you or anything of that sort.. or perhaps to you we don, but we show it in another which you perhaps fail to see it.

shall stop arguing till here. see you tmr..

and i said it all over again.1:15 AM